


You Are The One.

by bend_me_shape_me



Series: From Now On - Verse. [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Extra fluff, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Frottage, M/M, Road Trips, Summer, i warned you
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-23
Updated: 2019-04-23
Packaged: 2020-01-24 15:37:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,584
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18574444
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bend_me_shape_me/pseuds/bend_me_shape_me
Summary: I don't think I will ever be okay next to grapes. Thanks for reading, let me know what you think and come say hi on tumblr (bend-me-shape-me)! ❤





	You Are The One.

_‘Cause I know_   
_The first day that I met you_   
_I was never gonna let you_

_‘Cause you make my heart feel like it’s summer_   
_When the rain is pouring down_   
_You make my whole world feel so right when it’s wrong_   
_That’s why I know you are the one._

 

**Kodaline - The One.**

_ _

Dean teared his gaze from the road to look at Cas for a second, his messy hair moving around with the breeze coming in from the rolled down window, the sunset giving him an orange and yellow halo. He was wearing a pair of sunglasses he bought before the trip, an old and worn ac/dc t-shirt he stole from one of Dean's drawers and jeans, he was moving his head in time with the music and Dean didn't think he had ever seen him that relaxed.

He turned his head to look at the road again, nothing ahead but miles and miles of highway, a new tomorrow to live, behind them all the places they had visited, thousands of memories, photos to look at and stories to share.

He would cherished all those memories they created together for as long as he lived, the laughs and the quiet moments, the singing, pretty badly and as loud as possible, to Guns n’ Roses songs in the middle of the road; the naps, huddled close to each other even if it was too hot in their motel room because of a broken air conditioner, when there wasn't anything better to do;  the concerts, that classical music concert outdoor that Cas enjoyed so much. Just parking in the middle of nowhere to see the sunset, the sunrise or the stars, drinking beers on the hood of the impala or listening to music with the doors of the impala open, Cas nagging him once until he got him to let his beer aside for a dance under the open orange and pink vault of the sky at the end of the day. 

And hundred, thousands, of kisses, under the soft glow of the moon and the twinkling light of millions of stars; under the bright sunlight, that made Dean’s freckles stand up more all over his face; under the neon sign of a cheap pizza place, sharing a pizza and ice cream; the ones that tasted like cotton candy in top of a ferris wheel at a carnival, and those shared under the covers with the first ray of the sun waking them up and with a whispered good night before going to sleep.

Dean tapped his fingers against the wheel, humming to the song playing from the new mixtape they did together after the one Dean gave Cas was shattered.

It was the middle of august, they were somewhere close by the west coast, already in their way back to the bunker after all the summer on the road with a list of all the nice places they had visited to go back there with Sam, Eileen and Bobby. He couldn't wait to come back to the beach again, to enjoy the starry night sky on a towel on the sand, safe within Cas' arms, and for the calming sound of the waves crashing into the coast over and over to be the only thing he could hear.

They still hunted from time to time, Sam sending them cases that were near them, but mostly they just did nothing at all, visiting new places, or enjoying long lazy days at motel rooms when the warmth of the sun was too much to bear outside.

Dean had a mission during the trip, and that was to get Cas to see all he had already seen with other point of view, to enjoy and discover new experiences.

They weren't sad about having to come back, they had a great time, yes, but they missed their family, their home. 

They had a home. 

It made all the difference for Dean, they weren't moving around in a car because they didn't have a place to come back, they were doing this because they wanted to, and the moment they got tired of it they could just go back to the bunker. 

They would have wanted to do this earlier, but they had to stay back at the bunker, hunting and helping around, mostly to baby-proof the bunker, while Sam and Eileen stayed back waiting for little Bobby, their little nephew, a clone of his mom, and taking care of him when he finally arrived to this world ready to keep them all awake at night( Cas was great at night shifts since he didn't need to sleep) and turn their world around,  making them believe in a future that wasn't nothing like the one they had imagined themselves having so many times before; their life now, it all was like nothing they could have dreamed of.

Dean thought it was actually great, they had to stay back for the best reason in the world, and in that time Cas and he had the chance to really get used to being together, those first moments weren't easy, the whole new reaaltionship thing complicated by the threath of Heaven looming over their heads. 

Two years had gone by since they pull their head out of their asses and talk about their feelings for each other. Two years since he almost lost Cas to the ambitions of another angel, and there was still this fear sometimes, of another big bad coming to destroy the world, the fear of everything going too well, of losing all they had, of losing each other. It only made them want to live everything with more passion, to enjoy every second.

Heaven and Hell weren't a riot for once, the angels kept their promise and didn't try to hurt them again, and must of the hunts they found in their way were easy those days too, but it didn't mean things could go wrong from time to time (like that case with werewolves at the beginning of their trip, that could have sent Dean to the hospital, or something worse, if it hadn't been for Cas and his perfect timing). 

They also argued in occasions, normal stuff for all the couples, it was never too big, but they both were pretty stubborn sometimes. Their fights usually ended in kisses or laughs, though, because they couldn't be mad at each other, and they were trying their best to talk things out instead of bottling everything inside in true Winchester fashion , to express themselves and to never go to bed angry, and because Dean found too funny the fact they were there, together, arguing about little silly stuff, about dirty clothes, or dishes, about things he would never had imagined he would argue about with an angel of the lord. 

He couldn't believe sometimes how much their lives had changed since they met each other, he thought about it even more now that september was just around the corner.

That month marked a special date for them. They met ten years ago, and if he could go back in time, and tell himself from ten years ago he would be here today, with Castiel, he would have probably laughed at his own face. He had something big planned, he was finally to give the next step and ask Cas to marry him, he almost had everything planned and he could count on Sam and Eileen too.

“It's getting late.” Cas’ voice cut off his train of thoughts. “ Do you want me to look for a motel?”

“Yeah, Cas, please.” He wasn't against sleeping in the car or outside, but if he could choose he would rather sleep on a bed, his sore back would probably be thankful for the choice. 

He rubbed at his neck, smiling softly when Cas gently pushed his hand away to keep massaging the spot himself without looking up from his phone. 

They weren't driving with a chosen destination, because that didn't matter to them, but he'd hoped they could have reached the next town before night, but they had to stay at the last town they were visiting because they heard someone talk about a drive-in for the afternoon.  It was one of those new comedies that wasn't funny at all, he was more excited about the perspectives of dragging Cas to the cinema in november to watch Bohemian Rhapsody together; but it was worth it anyway, if only for Cas’ laughter coming from the spot where he was resting his head on his shoulder everytime something he found funny happened on the screen.

“There is a small village near, they have a two floors house that makes the function of a bed and breakfast, the place is quite beautiful. You just have to turn right in the next exit instead of driving straight like we are now.”

“Perfect.” 

He asked Cas to look for a place to have dinner on the way there too.

“There is a place at the town too, and nothing else, just a gas station on the way there.” Dean made a face, quickly shaking his head.

“No, thanks, gas station hot dogs are always awful.” Cas made a grimace at this phone.

“Yeah, I remember the ones at the gas n’ sip I worked at.” The comment and Cas’ tone were light, but Dean couldn't help but feel bad at the mention of that time.

He had asked for a forgiveness he wanted to believe he deserved, and he knew Cas had understood, if the situation had been different from them, he would have made his best to help Cas, to take care of him in such a difficult and confusing moment for him. And Cas had told him it was okay, that he had learned many things on his own, he told Dean when he asked about everything he lived, even the most little details, the good and the bad. Dean couldn’t help but tear up in sympathy while he listened.

‘’You know,’’ he had said once Cas was done, ''maybe now you don’t need the same things you needed back then, but Cas, you won’t ever lack anything, whatever you may need, we, I, will do the best to give it to you.’’ Cas only hugged him, and kissed his cheek with a hushed thank you. 

Cas must have sensed something was wrong. He didn't ask, he didn't need to, he knew Dean like the back of his hand, he had always had; but he moved the hand he had on Dean's neck to take one of Dean's own hands away from the wheel, moving their joined hands to his lap and letting them there for the rest of the way. Words could bring comfort to Dean, but a single simple touch could make him feel better too.

 

They finally arrived to the hostal after they had dinner, Dean took a look through the windshield, already feeling in a better mood. 

Cas had been right, the house was a lovely place, old, but lovely anyway, it reminded him a bit of that house haunted by a ghost they went to two years ago.

He really hoped this one didn't have any spirits inside.

“You took a look at opinions for this place?”

“Yes, I did.” Dean looked at him, waiting for him to keep going, Cas rolled his eyes, amused. “They don't have cold spots, weird noises at midnight, flying objects or ghosts, Dean.” Cas opened his door and stepped outside the car, waiting Dean by the trunk to pick up their luggage.

Dean shrugged, well, he would wait and see that with his own two eyes. He left the car too, stretching in his way to the trunk, grimacing at the pain in his back. 

He rang the doorbell, waiting for the door to open, hoping it wasn't too late and that they had to sleep at the car after coming all the way here.

The woman that greeted them was in her late fifties, she had long graying hair, clear blue eyes and a soft warm smile on her face.

“Good night gentlemen.”

“Hello.” Dean smiled back

“Come in.” She stepped back to let them in, she gestured at them to follow once they both were inside, stopping at a small desk next to the stairs. “ What can I do for you?”

“We need a room to pass the night and we need only-” he cut himself off, scratching at the back of his neck, this was just a little village what if this lovely-looking old lady told them to fuck off at the simple mention of needing just one bed for the both of them?

“One bed, right?” She finished for him, her bright smile not faltering a bit. Dean felt the warmth of Cas’ hand on the small of his back then.

“Yes ma'am, please.” She nodded, turning to pick a key for them, Dean kept his gaze focused on the magazines on the desk, he could feel Cas’ eyes staring intensely at the side of  his face, but Dean didn't look back. 

He knew Cas understood,  but deep down he didn’t really understand, well, he did, but he hadn't been in the receiving side of nasty looks as many times as him. And when he was he didn't seem to notice, and Dean wished he were that carefree sometimes, that he only cared about the opinions of his loved ones, and he did, but it didn't mean his blood boiled everytime they got a weird look or a whispered comment about them being together.

“Here you go.” She cut off his train of thoughts, waving the keys of their room in front of his eyes.

“Thank you.” Cas was faster than him, taking the keys and turning around to head towards the stairs, Dean tailing behind him.

He left his bag on the bed with a weary huff as soon as he step inside, Cas doing the same on the other side. Dean took a second to survey the place.

The room wasn't too big, it looked even smaller with the enormous bed in the middle of it, it had a dozen cushions on it, covered, just like the duvet and the walls, with flowers patterns, it was probably the most fancy place he had ever stayed at, but it was nice and they would only be here for a night anyway. 

“Huh, that's actually really nice.” Cas followed his gaze, looking at the thin curtains and the double doors. They had a balcony instead of a simple window. Dean closed the distance with hurried steps and opened the curtains and the doors. “Check it out, Cas!” The balcony wasn't that big, but it was a pleasant touch anyway; it had a view to the backyard and a group of trees behind the house, a breathtaking glimpse of the starry night, and it also had two rocking chairs and a round table between them.

Cas only hummed his agreement, hugging him from behind and resting his chin on his shoulder. Dean leaned back into Cas’ embrace. 

They stayed like that for a while, quietly enjoying the little moment of peace.

“Come on, Dean, we should get ready for bed.” Cas’ voice a whisper, he nosed at Dean's neck,  Dean nodded.

“I'm going to leave the doors open.” A soft breeze filled the room, and the sound of crickets outside relaxed him.

He took of his boots and shirt off walking away from the double doors and towards a little table next to the door of the room that had a complete ceramic tea set.

“Hey Cas!” He picked one of the mugs. “It’s tea time.” He said once Cas looked at him, with his pinky standing out and an accent, he got a roll of eyes as an answer. “This place surely is” he paused, leaving the mug in its place again, looking for the right word, “refined.” Cas simply shrugged.

“I'm sure it will be better for your back than sleeping in the car.” 

“You could have given me a massage,” he waggled his eyebrows at Cas, “ with a happy ending.”

“I can still do that here.” 

“Really?” Cas only gave him a look, raising one of his eyebrows before heading to the bathroom. “Oh, come on babe!” Damn Cas.

It was when Cas head peeked out the bathroom door, maybe to tell him they had a bathtub here, because that was the reason he entered the bathroom for on the first place, or maybe to give him a snarky remark, when they both heard it, a woman screamed, disrupting the quiet calm of that summer night, the sound came from the first floor.

“We don't get a break, man.” They both rushed outside the room, going down the stairs.

“Oh my god.”

“The kitchen.” Cas gave him a nod, both ready to reach for the weapons they always carried on them.

They both came to a halt the moment they set a foot in the room, Dean tried not to laugh, but he cleared his throat to let the lady know they were there. 

“Are you okay?” She gave him a look, she was dripping, trying to stop the flow of water from the broken kitchen sink with a towel.

“Yes.” Dean couldn't help to laugh then, both at the tone and the face of the woman. She huffed, but laughed too.“I don't know what happened! This place is so old.”

“Here, wait, let us help you.” He reached beneath the sink looking for the key to stop the water. He let out a victory 'aha’ when he found it. 

“Thank you,” She stepped back, Dean shrugged, “oh my, what am I going to do now? The plumber lives in the next town and I won't be able to serve breakfast tomorrow like this.” She pointed towards the pile of dirty tableware on the countertop.

“Hey, it's okay, we will take care of that, right?” He saw Cas nodding out the corner of his eye. She looked at them, unsure, she probably didn't want to make her guests work. “We will fix it, well, I'm not a plumber but I always fix stuff around our house, and,” he pointed at Cas with his thumb, “ I have the best helper right here. It's not a problem for us.” He looked at Cas.

“Of course. He is great at this, he is like Bob the Builder.” Cas gave her a reassuring smile. Dean stared at him, squinting his eyes, an habit he clearly had picked up from Cas.

“I can't do that, you are guests, I can't make you work here.”

“You aren't making us work, we are doing this because we want to help you, it's fine.” 

“Okay but at least breakfast will be on the house tomorrow.” Dean knew there wasn't a way to change the woman’s mind.

“Okay, thank you ma-”

“Angela.” She smiled.

“Beautiful name. Thank you, Angela.”

“My mom always talked about angels, about them watching over us, I have never seen one,’’ well, Dean and Cas share a quick and amused look, she clearly had now, he gave Cas a wink. When he looked back at her Dean noticed how Angela was gripping a tiny wooden set of wings she was wearing as a necklace; “ but I guess it gave her peace and hope. It gives me hope too, sometimes, like right now, you are my saving angels!’’ They laughed.

“My mom believed in them too.” Dean talked once they had calmed down. “I also believe in them, sometimes it’s hard to keep the faith, but good things and miracles do happen when darkness seems to fill everything. I’m sure they both were right and they are watching over us.’’ Angela gave them a soft smile, Cas was smiling at Dean too.

“I should go change my clothes, by the way, the tool box is in that closet. Thank you so much.” She left then, Dean inspected the sink as Cas walked towards the closet, opening the door and retrieving the red box.

“Bob the Builder, really?” Dean spoke up after a while.

“What? You always say I should watch cartoons too.”

“I mean things like Scooby Doo or Tom and Jerry, man, the classics.”

“It's one of Bobby's favourite ones.”

“He is a six months old baby, he likes whatever has colors and a stupid music.”

“Well, I like it, it's important for kids to learn about teamwork and optimism.” Dean shook his head with a huffed laugh.

“Okay, Cas.” He took the tool box out of Cas’ hands, almost dropping it, it was heavy as hell. “What does that woman keep here?” 

“Tools, Dean.” Cas deadpanned behind him.

“Ha ha.” It was Cas’ fault, he made everything look easier with his supernatural abilities, but hey he could pick Dean up and carry him around too, so not everything was bad. “Okay,” he clapped his hands together, “ let's see what we can do here. Please Cas, point the lantern she has there inside and pass me the tools.” 

They quickly got to work, a comfortable silence falling between them. 

It made Dean feel at home in a way, he loved fixing stuff around the bunker, and well it wasn't like they could phone someone every time something needed fixing to come to their super secret bunker.  He loved it even more if Cas decided to help him, usually by passing him the tools and keeping him accompanied, humming, talking and asking Dean things or simply sitting quietly by his side, reading or watching Dean work.

“Well, don't think this is going to be too difficult, it's just this part here, it has loosened up. Pass me a wrench, darling.” Cas handed him the tool. “Okay, I think this is fixed, is the tap closed?” 

“Yes.”

“Okay, I'm going to open the key again, open the tap.” Cas patted Dean's knee and got up from his spot on the floor next to Dean's legs. Cas did as told.

“You fixed it.”

“Great!” Cas closed the tap again, stepping back to help Dean stand again, watching him put the tools away. 

“Could you fix it?” Angela was back, staring at them from the door to the dining room.

“Yes, it was nothing, but I would call the plumber anyway, just in case.” Angela smiled warmly at him.

“Thank you so much -”

“Oh, Dean, and this is Castiel.” he gestured at Cas, who gave her a polite nod.

“Well thank you both, you have saved my night.” Dean blushed a little.

“It was nothing, really.” Dean yawned then. “Sorry, long day on the road.”

“You aren't from around here.” 

“No, we came from Kansas, we are in the middle of a summer roadtrip.” He put an arm around Cas’ shoulders to pull him closer.

“How romantic.” She gave them a wink, Dean only blushed more. 

“Yeah.” 

“Well, I think I should leave you two go to bed then. Thank you again.” 

“Good night, Angela.” Cas told the same before Dean took his hand and dragged him to their room for the night.

He sighed in relief when he reached the door and got a chance to go to the bathroom, Cas already on the bed when he went out, he made his way to the bed once he was done with his night rituals, he sat down on his side, checking his phone for any messages before going to sleep, he got up again, kneeling on the mattress to crawl next to his angel, and he laid on top of Cas, covering Cas’ body with his own, letting his head rest on his chest, groaning softly when Cas’ fingers started digging into his back, getting rid of all the little knots there, he massaged his back, his fingers leaving a warm sensation as they touched his skin, making the pain go away, Cas was humming what could only be Stairway to Heaven too.

“Night, Cas.”

“Good night, Dean, I love you.” Dean smiled, eyes closed.

“Love you too.” He couldn't fight sleep for any longer, not under the soft, loving and warm ministrations of Cas’ hands all over his skin.

 

* * *

 

 

When Dean woke up the next morning it was to an empty spot on other side of the big bed.

He yawned, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes, already thinking about a good warm cup of coffee, even if deep down he really would have wanted to stay under the covers next to Cas for a bit longer.

Dean yawned, stretching before leaving the bed for a quick visit to the bathroom, as he exited when he was done he noticed the doors to the balcony were closed, Cas was probably there, the doors closed to refrain from waking up Dean. He opened the doors, peering outside.

He was right, Cas was there, sitting on one of the rocking chairs, swinging slowly, at the balcony of the room. 

“Good morning, Dean.” He didn't look up from his phone.

“Morning, Cas.” He leaned in to kiss the side of Cas’ head before sitting down in the other chair. “What were you doing?” The air was heavy that morning, too hot, the sun hidden behind dark clouds that announced a storm. 

“Checking my messages.” 

“Something from the angels?” Because Heaven decided they should start using phones and emails, it amused Dean to no end, even if most of them didn't share the love his angel had for emoticons. Cas shook his head.

“It’s Sam.” 

“Something wrong?”  He really hoped it wasn't a case, and if it was he hoped it was something near them, and easy too, while he was at it.

“No, it's a video of Bobby.” Cas turned the phone for Dean, who let out a relieved sigh, he didn't want to leave so soon, to watch their nephew too. On the screen Bobby was sitting down on his high chair with an empty dish in front of him, a smear of food on his cheek, he was wearing the bib with dinosaurs Cas bought for him and he was laughing loudly while his mom made funny faces at him. Dean laughed too.

“He has all of us wrapped around his little finger.” 

“I miss them.”

“Same, well we still have some miles ahead but we will be back soon.” Cas nodded distracted, staring ahead. “Hey, are you okay?” Cas nodded again but Dean wasn't going to buy it, he knew he didn't have a nightmare last night, he would remember, maybe it was Cas who had one, not having to sleep didn't mean the memories didn't harass him at night, when there was few things for him to do but maybe read and wait for morning to come, watch over him too, like he always said.

“Yes.”

“Yeah, Cas, try again.”

“I'm fine.” The defensive tone of his voice told Dean that something was clearly wrong, but he would never pressure Cas to talk if he wasn't ready to do it, he would just give him space, because he needed it too, from time to time.

“I'll go get a mug of coffee.” He got up and rubbed Cas’ back, he had always been better at expressing himself like this, he hoped Cas got the message, that he was there for him, that it was going to be okay.” I'll bring you one too.”

“Thank you Dean.” Not for the coffee, for understanding him and being there.

Dean padded inside again, putting on a pair of jeans and a t-shirt, he opened the door with a last glance towards Cas’ back, wondering what could be wrong, and left.

He made his way down the stairs, once there he met another couple that were staying here in their way back from their honeymoon, they told him their car broke down a couple miles away and they were lucky it didn't happen in the middle of nowhere and they found this place to stay in. He wondered how they didn't hear the scream Angela let out the night before.

“Good morning, Dean, where is Castiel?” 

“He is still in bed, he is horrible in the morning.” He faked a smile. “I came down for some coffee.” She nodded. Something in her face told him she chose to believe his lie rather than really believing what he said.

“Of course, wait a second I will go grab a tray for you, do you want to try my homemade cookies too?” 

“That's sounds great, please.” He watched her go, checking his phone while he waited for her to come back with their breakfast. Nothing new, better, they didn't have to rush and maybe he could think of something nice to cheer up Cas, it would just suppose them to take a few hours detour from their plan, even if it was a week we wouldn't give a fuck, what is important is they both are okay and have a good time during each step of the way.

When he pocketed his phone again Angela was back, a tray swaying dangerously on both her hands. 

“Wait, let me help you.” He took the tray with a smooth movement, answering the thankful smile Angela gave him with one of his own. “These look great,” he gestured with his chin, pointing at the chocolate chips cookies, “thank you. And thanks from Cas too.” She nodded, her smile faltering a bit, he waited, she looked like she wanted to say something, but shook her head instead.

“It's nothing, you are both welcomed. By the way, I phoned the plumber, but the sink seems to function just fine, thanks again.” 

“No need to thank us. Well, I better go before the coffee gets cold.” 

“Yeah, yeah, of course.” He turned around, climbing the first steps, but he didn't get any further, “Dean?” 

“Yes?”

“It's not my place to say anything about it, and I will understand if you tell me to mind my own business, but,” she paused, waiting for him to say something, when nothing came from Dean she kept going. Dean eyes were trained on the patterns on the wall paper, “ I hope is nothing, I mean, whatever happened between you two,” she clearly was too damn clever, and Dean knew his worry for Cas showed on his face, no matter how hard he tried to hide it, “ and anyway I'm sure you will find a solution, I don't see what you have every day, and I have met many people believe me, but not many look at each other the way that you do or move around the other like you.” He finally moved, staring at her with a soft smile on his face. “It's something worth fighting for.” He reached out, supporting the tray on his left forearm, to pat the hand she was resting on the railing.

“Yes it is, I know.” The moment was over when the doorbell rang. Angela gave him a way and went open, letting Dean finally carry their breakfast to their room.

 

“Hey sweetheart, coffee is here.” Cas was still outside, staring ahead, his phone forgotten on the table. “Angela gave me some cookies too, they look great.” He let both mugs and the plate with the cookies on the table, he set the tray on the floor, watching Cas as he took the mug closest to him.

“Thank you, Dean.”

And then nothing, he sipped from the mug, not looking at Dean, and he wanted to ask, but he knew Cas knew he was there, that he was going to listen when he wanted to talk about it. He didn't reach out to touch him either, Cas needed space and he was going to give it, no matter how difficult it was for him to taper down his need to comfort Cas. 

He drank his coffee too, staring at the sky, the dark clouds were still there, a heavy smell of rain in the too hot breeze. He felt like he couldn't breathe for a second.

He didn't know for how long they were there, sitting in silence but suddenly, when almost all his mug was empty Cas spoke up quietly.

“Dean.” Dean stopped himself before taking a last sip, letting his mug on the table, next to Cas’ already empty mug.

“Yeah Cas?” Castiel still avoided his gaze. He took a deep breath. Dean watched his profile carefully, waiting.

“It's just, I,” a pause, he finally focused his eyes on Dean, he shook his head, “it's stupid.” 

“It isn't, I'm sure, whatever is bothering you, Cas, it's not something small or stupid.” Cas smiled a bit at that, a gesture that didn't reach his eyes. He looked to the trees again. Dean thought then that the clouds kept getting darker, he felt a hot prickling sensation in the back of his neck, a weird electricity buzzing in the atmosphere around them.

“I was thinking,” Dean tilted his head towards him, just another habit copied from Cas, he listened closely; “about what Angela said.” Dean was a bit lost, wondering what the nice woman could have said to upset Cas like this.

“Hum?”

“About the angels, I mean.” He clarified. “About having hope and faith in them, about them taking care of humans from Heaven.” 

“Pretty much what many people believe.” It was what Mary always told him. It was what he never was able to believe too, at least until almost ten years ago.

“I know that, and I guess, well, that it makes me feel bad.”

“Why?”

“People have faith, Dean, they hope, they pray, they look for comfort and help, guidance, but angels don't listen, they don't want to listen. Our father told us,” Cas tone changed, Dean was still angry at Chuck for leaving without taking a simple minute to talk with Cas, to give an answer to all those questions Cas needed to ask him, “he told us to love you humans, more than we loved him, and then he was gone and we did exactly the opposite thing. Lucifer was the one to end in Hell, but most of the angels that stayed back in Heaven, they didn't repulse human less than him did.”

“But, look at you, or Benjamin, not all of you are the same.” He had come to like Benjamin, it was weird, he never thought he could appreciate any other angel that wasn't his Cas, he was still number one on his list, but Benjamin was difficult to dislike. He came from time to time, mostly alone, other times with another angels from Cas’ past, they talked for hours, gossiping about god knew what in enochian, and it always was good for Cas, and Dean thought that was why he liked Benjamin so much, that and because the guy and his vessel had the most interesting conversations. Cas looked happier in a way Dean didn't usually see, he was happy with them, with Dean, of course, but he always had this contented smile when Benjamin left, the one people had after remembering good parts of their pasts with an old friend they hadn't seen in a long time.

“And anyway we have hurt humans too, I have hurt you, your brother, Jimmy and his family.” He gave Dean a quick glance. He had probably been thinking about this all night. He should have woken up Dean when it became too much to bear alone.

“You have always fought to do the right thing, you helped us stop the apocalypse. You defended humanity in front of your brothers and sisters when even us didn't have any faith in ourselves. You taught us, you made me see there were still angels that cared about us, you made me pray, when I had never had faith on anything.” Cas looked at him again, for longer this time but too soon for Dean his eyes were focused on the floor.

“I have always thought that you humans would have been better off without us, that you would have been better off without me.”

“Don't say that.” Cas said nothing. “Cas, look at me.” 

“What?” Cas eyes made him feel the weight of the sadness he was feeling.

“Think about it, no apocalypse, no people being used as vessels, you could have had the life you would have wanted to have.” 

“I have thought about it too, I have dreamt about a life that wasn't mine to live, and after all these years when I see myself where I'm now I know that I wouldn't want to change a damn thing. I have now things I never thought I would have. If you had asked me when I was twenty years old I would have told you that I would do anything to change my fate, but now, I wouldn't change a step of the way, all we have lived made us be who we are, and even with th nightmares we carry with us, I wouldn't want it to be any other way. Look at Sam and Eileen, I can tell you Sam wouldn't change a thing either. And I know that deep down you wouldn't either.”

“I would like to be able to erase some parts.” Cas had said sorry many times for Dean to know what he meant, he was talking about Naomi, about his try at being a god, his greatest hits.

“We all would like that, but you learn to live with them, they are a part of you, and Cas I would never want a life without you in it, don't ever say that again.” It horrorized him, to think about not having Cas by his side. 

“Despite the bad things?”

“You tell me, you love me despite them, why do you think I can't love you back?”  

In a quick movement he had a lapful of angel. The chair wasn't that big, but it wasn't a tight fit for both of them either. Cas put his arms around Dean's neck, hiding his face in his hair. Dean's eyes were wide open, but he quickly recovered, hugging Cas tightly, one of his hands moving in soothing circles on Cas’ back. 

“We all have made mistakes, that's what comes with free will, with choice, but Cas without you and all you all you have done by our side and for us, I don't think things had gone as well as they have. You have saved many lives, you have saved me, not only when you grabbed my ass and pull it out of hell.” Cas let out a laugh at that. ''You care, see, you take care of Claire, of us, of me, you know the wrong things you did are wrong, you wish you could make everything better for others, you help strangers on the street.'' He even once climbed a tree to rescue a little's girl cat, and the list could go and on. ''Maybe you think I tell you this because you are my boyfriend, but no Cas, I tell you this because I know you well.''

“Thank you.” 

“I love you.” Cas moved back to kiss him, whispering reverently those three words back before going back to his previous spot. 

They stayed like that, holding each other tight, lost in their own thoughts, for a while. Before it could rain the air slowly calmed down, the heavy pressure of the clouds easing a bit.

“Hey,” Dean said, his voice soft, “ we should pack and go back to the road,” Cas nodded against his neck, “ we can ask Angela for a nice place around here for a little picnic if you want.”

“I would love that, Dean. Just, give me a minute.” He tightened his grip around Cas.

“Whatever you need, sweetheart.”

 

 

Cas’ mood improved while they packed their things and soon, after a nice shower together, they were ready to leave. 

“It's a shame you have to leave so soon!” Angela told them once they had paid, less than Dean expected, for the room. She smiled when she saw her joined hands, her words from before were still echoing in Dean's thoughts, it was a good reminder he hoped he never forgot, this, what they had, it wasn't something that happened every day, they would always take good care of it, something so special was worth the bad things they had gone through. Cas thanked her, and praised her too, for the cookies.

“We have family back home waiting for us, and a long way ahead too.” Dean explained.

“It was a pleasure to have you here. Be careful out there.''

They asked her for a nice place to be alone and have that picnic not too far from here before leaving, she told them there were a creek and a clearage in the forest, just a bit apart from the road. She also told them the weatherman had said that it wouldn't rain more for the rest of the day. She gave them the directions to follow so they could find the place on their own and also more of those cookies for the trip.

They made a stop at the small grocery store of the village on their way to the forest to buy all they were going to need and some stuff for the rest of the trip( he had told Cas they were going to need more lube, but he was told he was exaggerating, well, clearly, he wasn't).

Dean tried not to laugh at Cas too excited expression when he was behind the shopping cart, he thought it was a little too big for the few things they needed to buy, but he wasn't going to say anything about it. He didn't quite get what Cas liked so much about grocery shopping, the one time he had asked Cas about it he had told him he liked it because it was a simple and relaxing daily activity. And also because that way he could make Dean buy more healthy stuff than when he went alone.

And that was why they were there right in the moment, staring challenging, at each other from opposite sides of the fruits and vegetables section.

Dean was going back to where he had left Cas and the shopping cart a couple minutes ago, but he stopped in his tracks, just watching Cas for a second, he was looking at the grapes, squinting at them, a few beats went by until he looked up and saw Dean standing in the opposite side of the aisle, beers and a bag of chips in his hands. He picked up the grapes then, as Dean walked towards him.

“You gonna eat all that?” 

“I like grapes, and you are going to eat too, by the way.” He looked at him dead in the eye, daring him to refuse to eat the damn grapes. So dramatic. He wasn't that young anymore, he knew, and he also knew Sam and Cas wanted him to eat better because they worried about him and his health. Dean huffed.

“Yeah, I mean, maybe one or two.” He wa going to eat, of course, he wasn't going to argue with Cas over fruit, not again, he had enough with sleeping on the couch once because of apples.

“Dean.” He sounded like a parent, ready to scold at him for not wanting to eat his veggies.

“Yeah, mom, I'm going to eat the grapes, I'm even going to buy lettuce and tomato for my sandwich, you happy now?” Cas rolled his eyes.

“Yes, Dean, I'm really happy now.” Dean gave him an exasperated look. Cas walked past him, pushing the shopping cart, he paused when he reached his side, kissing his cheek. “I'm going to ask if they have apple pie.” Ah, yes, his reward for being good and promising to eat the healthy stuff. “ We need some water bottles to keep in the car too.’’

“Good.” 

Once they were done at the supermarket, they got all the bags in the trunk and drove where Angela told them to go, Cas pressed up against his side all the way there, his head resting on Dean’s shoulder, nuzzling Dean from time to time when he lifted his hand to thread his fingers in Cas’ hair and turned his head to drop a lingering kiss on the top of Cas’ head . 

It wasn't that hard to find the place, they had to leave the car and walk the rest of the way once there wasn't more road to keep driving thought, he hoped nothing bad happened to his baby while they were gone.

They visited the creek first, if the weather had been better they would have probably gone for a quick bath. They sat around on a big rock for a while, shoulders pressed close, skipping stones on the water, Dean laughing every time Cas couldn't contain his supernatural strength and threw them too far away; a nice comfortable silence settled between them. 

Cas took his camera out, the one he had gotten a couple years ago and that he carried with him everywhere, to snap some pictures of their surroundings, like he had done in every other place they had visited before. Dean made an ugly face when Cas turned the camera on him, he had been waiting for it for a couple of minutes.

“Dean.” The threat of being grounded without pie was implicit in his name. Dean snickered, but he stare at Cas, instead of at the camera, smiling softly at him as Cas took the pic. Cas almost never let him see them, Dean joked about it, saying it was because the camera was full of photos of him sleeping, but he didn't mind waiting for Cas to chose the ones he liked more and print them to see them, even if he had never denied the accusation, and he even messed with Dean keeping a folder on his computer called 'pics of Dean being cute while he sleeps’.

Dean stomach growled then. Cas put the camera away and got up, offering Dean a hand.

“Come on, let’s look for a nice place to have lunch.’’ Dean let him help him stand.

They walked around for a few minutes, soon finding the clearage. It was rather beautiful, flowers of a dozen different colours dancing with the soft breeze among the tall green weeds, a few solitary birds chirping around in the nearby trees, there was only a narrow path to get into and exit the clearage.

Cas hold the grocery bags as Dean settled the blanket down on the ground. They both sat down, quickly getting to work, getting the food ready. 

They ate, well Dean did most of the eating, and drank their beers between laughs and stories that maybe they had heard a million times but that they never get tired of.

Once he was done with his sandwich Dean, picked a flower and put it in Cas’ hair, he then patted all his pockets, looking for his phone. 

“Come here,” he said once the phone was in his hand, “Sam told me to send him a selfie or something.” He put his arm around Cas’ shoulders, moving the phone until they were both framed on the screen. He smiled a bit. “ Cas I don’t think smiling is going to kill you.’’ Cas rolled his eyes, “if this one looks nice we can print it for our room.’’ Cas' eyes lit up at that, Dean thought if they were going to run out of space for pics on the walls, Cas nodded and finally smiled. Dean snapped a pic, not wasting a second before looking at the results. “Nice.’’ Cas looked over his shoulder.

“I love it Dean.’’

Dean tapped on the screen, opening his chat with Sam. He wrote a message too to send it with the pic, 'we are having a picnic,’ it said, 'this maniac is making me eat grapes, Sam.’ 

He pressed the send button, laughing when Sam answered him with a bunch of laughing emojis. He put the phone away, Cas was staring at him with intent.

“Well…”

“What?”

“About those grapes you said you were going to eat, I think it’s time Dean.”

‘’Yeah, yeah, give me.’’ Cas passed him the grapes, watching him amused as he looked at them from all the possible angles. He finally picked out one, eating it, he picked another one, putting it in front of Cas’ mouth.

‘’One for me, one for you.’’ Cas sent him an amused glance, but ate the grape anyway, kissing the tip of Dean's fingers once he was done. Something shifted in Dean’s expression then, the jest gone from his features, in its place an expression Cas knew to well, the green in his eyes slowly receding, eaten by the black of his pupils. He took another grape, throwing it and catching it with his mouth.

“You are not going to distract me, Dean.’’

“You sure?’’ His voice dropped. Cas nodded, swallowing with effort. 

Before Cas could say anything else Dean launched forwards, making Cas fall backwards on the blanket, hovering over him, his knees by both of Cas’ hips.

‘’Hey there, handsome.’’ Cas smiled up at him, his hands closing over his elbows before slowly wandering up all the way up to his shoulders, his right hand staying over Dean’s left shoulder, the other one settling over Dean’s neck, scratching lightly at the back of his head.

He tried to pull him down for a kiss then, but Dean stopped him. 

“Oh no, Cas, first the grapes.’’ Cas huffed, but let Dean touch his lower lip with another grape, catching it with his teeth, his grip in the nape of Dean’s neck only tightened when Dean lowered himself down to catch the other half of the grape.

‘’See?’’ Cas said a little out of breathe. “ Eating healthy food can be great.’’ Dean laughed.

“You are right.’’ For Cas’ great relief he dipped his head down again, this time for a slow kiss that made Cas’ toes curled inside his boots. Dean moved back, touching Cas’ nose with his own. He kissed Cas’ jaw, pressing their crotches together with a smooth movement of his hips.

“Dean’’ There were few things he enjoyed as much as seeing Cas this wrecked, and as much as hearing his name fall from those lips he could kiss for hours in that rough tone. He repeated the movement again and again. Cas threw his head back, letting out a deep groan closing his eyes, he barely noticed the now forgotten grapes next to his head. Dean supported his weight on his forearm, his free hand finding its way under Cas’ t-shirt, his fingertips tracing patterns on the warm skin over Cas’ ribs. Cas pulled him down for another kiss.

“What do you want Cas?’’ Dean said against his lips.

“Just touch me, Dean.’’ He never stopped himself before asking for what he wanted in bed, but he also trusted Dean to take care of him and make him feel good.

It was when things started to get really interesting, Dean's hand _oh_ so close to Cas’ zipper when the first drops fell.

“Oh come on.” 

The rain started falling with force then, not giving them any time for picking everything up.

“The car is too far.” 

The flash of lighting,  the growl of thunder.

“I think I saw a barn near in our way here, Dean.” Dean realized he wasn't getting wet anymore. Cas smiled a bit. ''You are going to catch a cold, come on.”

“Thanks, darling.”

Ten minutes later they were opening the front door of the barn, the rain only growing stronger outside, drumming against the roof, some drops falling to the floor inside trough little cracks and leaks in it. 

Dean looked at Cas, trying not to laugh.

“What?”

“You are dripping.” He looked like a grumpy wet cat. “Here, let me help you.” He got Cas out of his wet shirt, Cas combed his hair back, getting it out from his forehead and eyes, Dean thought he needed a haircut before he had to deal with another Sam letting his mane flow around in the wind in the bunker. Dean unfolded the blanket they were using, it was a bit wet too but it was better that Cas’ soaked clothes anyway, he put it around Cas’ shoulders tightly. “Angel burrito ready.” 

“You should take your boots and socks off, Dean.” He found two wooden boxes, sitting down on one of them, staring at Dean while he sat down too and took off his boots. Cas closed his eyes.

“It’s just a summer storm, it will be over soon.”

“Great.”

“I could have flown both of us to the car, you know.’’ Dean shook his head.

“It’s okay, we will wait until it passes.’’ He didn’t like angel airways too much, even for short distances, it made him feel dizzy, and he didn’t want Cas to tire out for nothing, he was able to fly, but it could still take a toll on him, more if he had to carry Dean too.

He looked around then, not that he could see much with the poor light that reached inside through a small window, it was like any other barn, old and dusty, forgotten for god knows how long. 

“You know Cas,” Cas hummed, “this place looks a bit like the barn where we met.” Cas opened his eyes again, looking around too. 

“A little bit, hope you aren't going to stab me again.” Dean laughed.

“No, I promise.”

“Good.”

“Do you ever,” Dean paused, Cas didn't say anything, waiting for him to keep going, “ think about that day? I mean, look how far we have come, we have been together for two years now, and to think that we met ten years ago, I wouldn't have thought for a second in that barn that we would be where we are now.” 

“Of course I think about it too, and I understand what you mean, I didn't think there about the possibility, of well, you and me living all we have lived together, and even less of being with you like we are now. It makes me dizzy, it's funny how thing can change, how everything you thought you knew can be challenged, in the blink of an eye.” 

Dean decided then he didn't want to wait a second more, big plans and rings be damned. 

He suddenly got up, staring down at Cas.

“Where are you going? It's still raining.” Dean shook his head.

“I'm not going anywhere, it's just, well, this isn't what I wanted to do but, I'm going to,” he cut off his ramblings, getting down in one knee in front of Cas, he took his hand with both his own, looking at their joined hands he took a deep breath and looked up at Cas again, “Castiel, I, well -’’ Cas interrupted him with a raised hand.

“Wait, are you really asking me to marry you in this place?”

“Well, hum,” Dean looked away, rubbing the back of his head, his cheeks were a deep shade of red, “yes? I mean, I know it's not the best place, and well I had a whole thing prepared but I thought that it was nice, you know, it's like the one we met in and -”  Cas stopped listening to his rambling.

He was so in love with this man, the fact he had something prepared but decided to do it there instead, because it reminded him of the place where both their lives changed forever.

“Dean,’’ Dean was still talking, “yes.’’

“And I was thinking about flowers too, but that’s a bit too much so - Wait, what?’’ Cas threw his arms around Dean’s neck, Dean hugged him back after a beat.

“Yes, Dean, yes. Of course I will marry you.’’

“Yes?’’ Cas nodded.

“I love you, I will love you forever.’’

“I had a whole speech prepared, and rings hidden in my drawer too.’’ Cas laughed a bit.

‘’It doesn’t matter, Dean.’’ It was perfect the way it was.

“Maybe you, you know, it’s a small human custom, I just want to make it official, and I want you to understand that I will live as long as the universe lets me live loving you, everyday a little bit more, even if every night I go to bed thinking I can’t love you more.’’

“Dean, I,’’ his voice wavered, “there is nothing on the universe I would love more than being by your side, and remind you how special and loved you are with every dawn and with every good night.’’ He moved back then, one of his hands cupping Dean’s cheek, his thumb slowly stroking Dean’s cheekbone, he kissed Dean’s cheek a couple times, then the tip of his nose. 

They didn’t break away for a long time, trading gentle kisses and soft touches long after the rain had stopped.

“We should get back, we still can reach the next town before sunset.’’ Cas nodded, letting go of him with a last kiss.

They walked back to the car holding hands tightly, smiling happily at each other from time to time. 

Dean was even more excited about coming back home now, he couldn’t wait to give Cas his ring and to share the big news and their happiness with the rest of his family.

**Author's Note:**

> I don't think I will ever be okay next to grapes. Thanks for reading, let me know what you think and come say hi on tumblr (bend-me-shape-me)! ❤


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